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Dying: A Memoir, by Cory Taylor
Download Ebook Dying: A Memoir, by Cory Taylor
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"Bracing and beautiful . . . Every human should read it." ―The New York TimesA New York Times Book Review Editors' Choice and 2017 Critics' Pick One of Barack Obama's Favorite Books of 2017
At the age of sixty, Cory Taylor is dying of melanoma-related brain cancer. Her illness is no longer treatable: she now weighs less than her neighbor’s retriever. As her body weakens, she describes the experience―the vulnerability and strength, the courage and humility, the anger and acceptance―of knowing she will soon die.
Written in the space of a few weeks, in a tremendous creative surge, this powerful and beautiful memoir is a clear-eyed account of what dying teaches: Taylor describes the tangle of her feelings, remembers the lives and deaths of her parents, and examines why she would like to be able to choose the circumstances of her death.
Taylor’s last words offer a vocabulary for readers to speak about the most difficult thing any of us will face. And while Dying: A Memoir is a deeply affecting meditation on death, it is also a funny and wise tribute to life.
Product details
Hardcover: 152 pages
Publisher: Tin House Books; 1 edition (August 1, 2017)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1941040705
ISBN-13: 978-1941040706
Product Dimensions:
5.4 x 0.7 x 8.1 inches
Shipping Weight: 9.1 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.1 out of 5 stars
89 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#158,471 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
Cory Taylor was facing death. Imminently. She didn’t think she would be in this space as quickly as she was. She had brain cancer, a result of melanoma. She wrote a memoir called DYING: A MEMOIR. She seemed to truly have come to terms with the process. She wrote about how she wished more than anything that she, we collectively, could die the way we want. Rather than to suffer a lengthy process that is difficult, often painful on the patient, and for their family. It’s bad enough that you must die, why prolong it. When faced with the options that suicide holds, she was not interested. It is too terrifying and she didn’t want to beholden her family with the aftermath. She had purchased a drug from China but she knew too, that this was not really a way out in the end. She couldn’t bear to burden her husband or another family member to commit an illegal act that she so wished were not illegal.Instead, she wrote what her directives were and hoped that they were carried out in the end. Isn’t this what we all hope.Sadly, there are those who are not able to make that choice. When death is sudden. She talks about losing her mother suddenly and not being present at her death. The same with her father. This is a big part of why she is so conscious of making this decision. She has learned. Previously, she was not aware of all that death entailed. Most of us don’t. Until it happens.Taylor’s story is so sad. Her illness is so unfair. Her ability to put her thoughts together, even when she is at this late stage, is one of the most beautiful gifts that I can think of. Not only for someone who is facing what she is facing but for those of us who are living.There are many bright lights in the book. One that caught my attention is of a biographer who came to Taylor as part of her hospice care. As part of her care, she was assigned a person who comes to see her to capture her story and write it down to then share with her family when she is gone. What a beautiful and significant keepsake this is. For someone who may not be a writer or storyteller, this is a gift that I would have given anything to have of both of my parents before they passed away. There will always be questions that go unanswered. That you will want to ask but cannot. This woman who came to Taylor plays a key role in her life.DYING is not a morbid book. It is reality. Something that our culture does not talk about a lot. It is not something we want to face but when we do have to face it, whether unexpectedly or with warning, we don’t necessarily know how. Grief is very personal. Everyone has their own way. She is simply trying to show you one way.Â
I've been thinking of dying and loss for most of my life due to circumstances in my family of origin. Now near 70 years old and still in excellent health I work with others in my state to have aid-in-dying legislation enacted. I want it as an option for myself and others who feel the same.Taylor is a gifted writer and storyteller who shares her thoughts about the totality of life, her life, but also helps us see ourselves and our fellow travelers as people with different paths on the same journey. We are born and that fact means we will die. It behooves us to teach our young throughout life in sensitive, age-appropriate ways that life is a time-limited gift. I finished reading with tears of joy, reflection and gratitude for the gift Taylor gave me in Dying: A Memoir.
I am 76 years old, thank God, in good health but hell this is not middle aged. To quote On Golden Pond, "I am not middle aged; middle aged means the middle of your life; we don't know anyone who is a 152 years old!" So I'm reading works on dying and how to do it. My wife died at 51 of lung cancer and she died after a 5 year battle with great dignity and courage. I, too, want to die that way without being a burden to my family and friends. Cory Taylor died at 61 of melanoma and in this work she shares her journey with death. A must read if you want to die in charge not a victim of other peoples' idea of death and dying.
Hate to be the downer here. The book is well written, but is, essentially, NOT a story about dying. Its an autobiography. A very proportionately small amount of the book is dedicated to what its like to be dealing with rapidly approaching death. Its the story of her life, from young childhood to adult. If you are looking for deep insight on the dying process, there are other books that do this better. If you want to read about someone's family dynamics and past life experiences, you might enjoy this.
This book stands out for its unselfconsciously beautiful writing. Without fuss, it takes you through one elegant paragraph after another. The author has a particular knack for describing places and landscapes, and was well traveled, so it is a vicarious pleasure to get to "see" Fiji, a farmhouse in rural Australia, a safari in Kenya etc. through her eyes. What is problematic is that very little of the people themselves come through except for the author. And she has had such a full, lucky life by her own reckoning that she has little to say about leaving it except that she is comforted that she can kill herself if she so chooses. She goes to meetings of a chapter of a Right to Suicide society and notes blandly that there are some teens there but can't imagine why. I am not sure if it is because she has never experienced depression that she so blind to the teens' reasons for being there, but to me it was an example of how she often stayed on the surface of unfathomably dark issues. In the end it is a smoothly written, quick read that is pleasant as far as it goes, but doesn't have as much to say about an important subject than I would have liked.
What a gem of a book. The author, playwrite and novelist faces her untimely death due to melanoma in an unsentimental recording of her last thoughts of life on earth and the possibility of life hereafter. It does not drag you down into the day to day problems of the illness itself but reflects on being a little piece of the universe and what it means. Cory encounters both the problems and freedoms of not being of any religious heritage. Cory is gone but I am sure her work will endure. I have read it twice and will likely read it again.
I also have a terminal cancer, and similar age, and I related to much of her thinking. Made me feel more secure in my convictions.
As much about living as about dying. It's the best book on the subject of dying I have read so far. It is lyrical and realistic without a trace of self-pity. It leaves you uplifted somehow and not in fear of dying. But if you are not living your life well, it will leave you in terror of death. Highly recommended.
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